I think I just like writing about food! Here is a reply I wrote to my sister after she said she made stirfry cabbage and jalapenos. Poor cabbage never had a chance did it? It was doomed from the start! Has PACA (People Against Cabbage Abuse) picketed your house yet? Any write ups in the local papers or radio/television interviews? Have you thought about effects on the offspring of this poor cabbage (known as the cabbets)? And have you no feelings for this cabbage but to chop him/her into bits and stir fry? At least it should of had the choice of being quartered and boiled with some other of its garden friends (mainly Pete the Potato and Penny the Parsnip also known as PP and PP).! Even a nice dressing (mayonnaise and sugar) to heal its wounds after being shredded would have been more humane! It probably never saw it coming did it? After the atrocities of the Germans and the Koreans it was never believed that such a thing could ever happen again! And don't even think that you can get away with this I have already notified Mr. and Mrs. Hal O. Peno of the suspected abduction of their children plucked from the vine of life in their infancy. I suspect that once the rest of the Garden People (not related to The Village People) hear of this that there will be a uprising next spring! Already there is BEETing of the drums, the Corn has already lent an ear, the Beans are a little green (at the bar to late last night) but I am sure that they will sprout into action. Even some of their enemy's are creeping in on the action represented by Mr. Dan D. Lyon of the Green Party. This will very likely turn very political when Zu Keeny on the hill hears of this. Even the Chive family is raising a stink about this whole ordeal! Please think of the consequences the next time you think of stir-frying. Gary
