Thought for the day...

If a book about failures doesn’t sell, is it a success?

What would you do if an endangered animal eats an endangered plant?

Is it possible to be totally partial?

If a policeman arrested a mime, does he have the right to be noisy?

Whatever happened to Preparations A through G?

Why do they call it the Department of Interior when they are in charge of everything outdoors?

If you get cheated by the Better Business Bureau, who do you complain to?

 

How can “crash course” and “collision course” have two different meanings?

Inside every small problem is a large problem struggling to get out.

If you can keep your head when all about you are losing theirs, maybe you just don’t understand the situation.

Complex problems have simple, easy to understand wrong answers.

The bigger they are the harder they fall. But the bigger they are the harder they hit too.

If it’s green or it wiggles, it’s biology.
If it stinks, it’s chemistry.
If it doesn’t work, it’s physics.

Some people will buy anything that’s one to a customer.

 

People will accept your idea much more readily if you tell them Ben Franklin said it first.

The quartermaster has only two sizes; too large and too small.

Don’t ever allow any inanimate object realize that you are in a hurry.

Logic is a systematic method of coming to the wrong conclusion with confidence.

The trouble with most jobs is the job holder’s resemblance to being one of a sled dog team. No one gets a change of scenery except the lead dog.

Once you open a can of worms, the only way to re-can them is to use a bigger can.

If it jams, force it. If it breaks, it needed replacing anyway.

 

Enough research will tend to support your theory.

If the facts don’t conform to the theory, discard them.

The trouble with resisting temptation is that it may never come your way again.

A taxpayer is one who does not have to take a civil service exam in order to work for the government.

An ounce of image is worth a pound of performance.


Government expands to absorb revenue and them some.
A man with a watch knows what time it is. A man with two watches is never sure.

 

Nothing is impossible for the man who does not have to do it himself.

Two wrongs won’t make a right, but three rights will make a left.

It is said that in a year there is a ton of cement poured for each man, woman and child in the world. That is hard to believe.

The downside to being better than everyone else is that people assume you are pretentious.

When you earnestly believe you can compensate for a lack of skill by doubling your efforts, there’s no end to what you can’t do.

Quitters never win and winners never quit, but those who never win and never quit are idiots. Or if quitters never win and winners never quit, what fool came up with, “Quit while you are ahead?”

It’s amazing how much easier it is for a team to work together when no one has any idea where they’re going.

 

You’ll always miss 100% of the shots you don’t take, and, statistically speaking, you’ll probably miss 99% of the shots you do take.

It takes months to find a customer, but only seconds to lose one.

Luck can’t last a lifetime, unless you die young.

If you can’t learn to do something well, learn to enjoy doing it poorly.

Fight workplace demotivation: fire unhappy employees.

The tallest blade of grass is the first to get cut by the lawnmower.

If at first you don’t succeed, failure may be your style.

 

There are no stupid questions, but there are a lot of inquisitive idiots out there.

No matter how great and destructive your problems may seem, remember, you’ve probably only seen the tip of them.

When geese fly in the right formation they only need half the effort. Even in nature, teamwork results in collective laziness.

Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.

Success is a journey, not a destination. So stop running.

One secret of success is knowing who to blame for your failures.

 

In the battle between you and the world, bet on the world.

Sometimes the harder you try, the dumber you look.

If you never try anything new, you’ll miss out on many of life’s disappointments.

Mediocrity: It takes a lot less time and most people won’t notice the difference, until it’s too late.

Sacrifice: Your role may be thankless, but if you’re willing to give it your all, you just might bring success to those who outlast you.

It’s always darkest just before it goes pitch black.

Adversity: That which does not kill you postpones the inevitable.

 

So get to know that guy called nobody