Thought for the day...

The best way to win an argument is to begin by being right.

Advertising may be described as the science of arresting human intelligence long enough to get money from it.

The closest to perfection a person ever comes is when they fill out a job application.

The brain is a wonderful organ; it starts the minute you wake up in the morning and doesn’t stop until you get to the office. Robert Frost

There is no traffic jam on the extra mile.

It is better to give than to lend, and it costs about the same.

Laugh and the world laughs with you. Snore and you sleep alone.

 

A chip on the shoulder is often a block of wood that has fallen from the head.

Ninety-eight percent of the adults in this country are decent, hard-working, honest Americans. It’s the other lousy two percent that get all the publicity. But then, we elected them. Lily Tomlin

All you need to grow fine, vigorous grass is a crack in your sidewalk. Will Rogers

Income tax has made more liars out of the American people than golf has. Will Rogers

Consistency requires you to be as ignorant today as you were a year ago.

All sunshine makes a desert.

Get out of the forest while you still have daylight. Japanese proverb

 

The first day of spring is one thing and the first spring day is another. The difference between them is sometimes as great as a month.

Preparedness is the key to victory. MacArthur

We cannot direct the wind, but we can adjust the sails.

Part of the secret of success in life is to eat what you like, and let the food fight it out inside. Mark Twain.

Men, for the sake of making a living sometimes forget to live.

Travel teaches toleration. Benjamin Disraeli

However high a tree, the shortest ax can reach it’s trunk. Chinese proverb

 

Never forget that the bacteria watch us from the other end of the microscope.

In nature there are neither rewards nor punishments; there are consequences.

Who goes for a day in the forest should take bread for a week. Czech proverb

Do not think that when you close your eyes that night descends upon the whole world.

If you have to swallow a frog, it’s better not to look at it too long. Mark Twain

In the realm of science, there is nothing more repugnant than a miracle.

He who asks a question is a fool for five minutes; he who does not ask a question remains a fool forever. Chinese proverb

 

It is better to travel alone than with a bad companion.

Nature has given us two ears, two eyes, and but one tongue. To the end that we should hear and see more than we speak. Socrates

It is the nature of government that it eventually ends up in the hands of the wrong people.

The cost of lumber is so high these days that it is hard to believe it grows on trees.

I have opinions of my own, strong opinions, but I don’t always agree with them. George Bush

Not only is he ambidextrous, but he can throw with either hand. Duffy Daugherty

We’ve got to pause and ask ourselves: How much clean air do we want? Lee Iacocca

 

From an IRS letter: Please provide the date of your death...

Traditionally, most of Australia’s imports come from overseas.

A verbal contract isn’t worth the paper its written on.

The people in the Navy look on motherhood as being compatible with being a woman.

Rear Admiral James R. Hogg

Correction notice in the Ely Standard, a British newspaper: We apologize for the error in last week’s paper in which we stated that Mr. Arnold Dogbody was a defective in the police force. We meant, of course, that Mr. Dogbody is a detective in the police farce.

Are antidotes what you take to prevent dotes?

True happiness is finding someone who will put up with you.

 

The most popular human pastime is denial.

A pessimist even complains about the noise when opportunity knocks.

Help a man when he is in trouble and he will remember you when he is in trouble again.

You can lead a man to slaughter but you can’t make him think.

I get plenty of exercise just pushing my luck, but I get most of it by walking around looking for a place to sit.

Imagination is the one weapon in the war against reality.

 

Man invented language to satisfy his deep need to complain. Lily Tomlin

Too bad the only people who know how to run the country are busy driving cabs and cutting hair. George Burns

Doing a thing well is never a waste of time.

I either want less corruption or more chances to participate in it.

An intellectual snob is someone who can listen to the William Tell Overture and not think of The Lone Ranger. Dan Rather

Why is it that our memory is good enough to retain the least triviality that happens to us, and yet not good enough to recollect how often we have told it to the same person?