Thought for the day...

13. Law of Physical Surfaces -
The chances of an open-faced jam sandwich landing face down on a floor are directly
correlated to the newness and cost of the carpet or rug.

14. Law of Logical Argument -
Anything is possible IF you don't know what you are talking about.

15. Law of Physical Appearance -
If the clothes fit, they're ugly.

16. The 50-50-90 Law
Whenever there's a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there's a 90% probability that you'll get it wrong.

17. Law of Commercial Marketing Strategy -
As soon as you find a product that you really like, they will stop making it OR the store will
stop selling it!

18. Doctors' Law -
If you don't feel well, make an appointment to go to the doctor, by the time you get there, you'll feel better. But don't make an appointment and you'll stay sick.

 

The likelihood that a wrench will slip and mar the surface is directly proportional to the newness of the surface.

A society grows great when old men plant trees, the shade of which they know they will never enjoy.

“Put your hand on a hot stove for a minute, and it seems like an hour. Sit with a pretty girl for an hour, and it seems like a minute. That's relativity.” Einstein

 

The tree that never had to fight
For sun and sky and air and light,
But stood out in the open plain
And always got its share of rain,
Never became a forest king
But lived and died a scrubby thing.

The man who never had to toil
To gain and farm his patch of soil,
Who never had to win his share
Of sun and sky and light and air,
Never became a manly man
But lived and died as he began.

Good timber does not grow with ease,
The stronger wind, the stronger trees,
The further sky, the greater length,
The more the storm, the more the strength.
By sun and cold, by rain and snow,
In trees and men good timbers grow.

Where thickest lies the forest growth
We find the patriarchs of both.
And they hold counsel with the stars
Whose broken branches show the scars
Of many winds and much of strife.
This is the common law of life.

 

Then I should be extremely strong with all the pain I have.

 

You have to dance with the girl you take to the party.


Aphorism: Is a short, pointed sentence that expresses a wise or clever observation.


The nicest thing about the future is that it always starts tomorrow.


Money will buy a fine dog, but only kindness will make him wag his tail.

 

But I just took a shower...

 

If you don't have a sense of humor, you probably don't have any sense at all.


A good time to keep your mouth shut is when you're in deep water.


How come it takes so little time for a child who is afraid of the dark to become a teenager who wants to stay out all night?

 

You'll get it sooner or later. Just think so strong. Then of odor.

 

Business conventions are important because they demonstrate how many people a company can operate without.


Why is it that at class reunions you feel younger than everyone else looks?


No one has more driving ambition than the teenage boy who wants to buy a car.

 

There are no new sins; the old ones just get more publicity.


There are worse things than getting a call for a wrong number at 4 a.m. For example, it could be the right number. (Think about this one.)


No one ever says "It's only a game" when their team is winning.