I'm on a journey after an unfortunate incident with ours. Thought I'd post along the way if other parents are interested. One youtube video Mom reviewer is an IT Lady and has this website below. If you sign up for the newsletter you can print a **contract between parents and child** about having a phone. Kiddo was extremely appreciative and understood all of it, a couple of the points she wanted clarification. (I'm regret I didn't look further before and only depended on the parental controls instead). Home - Family Tech We read it together, then she read it outloud and Dad and and I, I told her initial it by signing initials like a mortgage closing that meant she understands what the all the check boxes mean. It really went well.
I learned to google "how to bypass .......... company parental controls" Many are too easy for techy kids to circumvent, and dead meat on bus rides with older kids that will do it for them.
Apple products have trouble with 3rd party parental controls and in many cases are easier to bypass. When I went to get kiddo a phone for tracking her on long bus rides home I let her choose an Iphone, I did not know it was easier bypass parental controls and turned loose on the internet nor the struggle I would have trying to navigate there since I only know Android.
Big responsibility for a young child. Probably could have started with a pay by the minute type of phone? I have seen kids that "needed" phones at young ages and immediately abused the privilege/responsibility of having one. Saddest part is that nothing happened to them-they got to keep their phone! I just was thinking how much times have changed. When I got my first gun the only cautionary speech I received was "be careful". Apparently, more caution is needed with cell phones?
I'm confused...so kiddo has this phone, and everything has been fine, or she figured out how to bypass everything right away? Pay by the minute flip phone with no internet connection will fix that problem.
I don’t understand parents obsession with needing to know where their child is at all times. Our parents didn’t have that feeling or luxury and it turned out ok. Being a teacher, I see how phones are ruining kids and that’s why my son is the only 6th grader in his school who doesn’t have a phone yet. We will reluctantly be giving in when he turns 13 this summer however. As for controls on electronics, I wish everyone well on that. Kids are so tech savvy and once one figures out how to navigate around them, they all do.
I'm becoming more and more grateful i don't have kids. Helicopter parents are the worst. Kids can't grow when they arnt left alone to learn on their own sometimes. All they know how to do is repeat what they were told but they don't have the slightest clue as to why they do what they do. (Obviously this rant isn't necessarily just about parental controls and isnt directed at anyone specifically).
Pretty much, got it for her Aug 2021 when she started school in town, 3 bus transfers each way so I could track her location, she had just turned 10 years old that summer, it worried me being so far away from her not confined to the little country school out here. Worked til right after Christmas Break this year when an older girl school girl showed her a trick and downloaded social media chats. She's not allowed any social media of any kind.... We found out in March. No games either, too hard to tell which ones have chats and which ones don't as well as some require to see what's in the phone including her pictures, ummm. No.
Afraid those don't have tracking capability, and both those and the watches depend on decent cell signal which we don't have out here. Also we dropped our land line a few years ago, all our calls here are wifi calls, which requires internet
My wife sewed air tags in to my kids backpacks…. Of course if they are separated from their bags this will be ineffective but they always have them with. Not so much for day to day tracking but if anything ever happens.
I am sorry, but I think it is too risky not to have phones with your kids. Too much hell happens these days. Shootings, kidnapping etc is out of control. Kids need a way out when they get in over their heads. Parents need to have an understanding with the kids, that with the phone comes trust and some monitoring. Let them know the consequences of bad choices before they occur. Grounding them seemed to work the best for our four. One of granddaughters was in the area the evening of the mass shooting in Lewiston on 25 Oct. Her parents were going crazy until she called to let them know she escaped the area and was safe with the adult parents of her friends.
My wife works with kids who are suicidal, making threats of suicide, or who have made threats to others. Phones and social media are a huge part of why these kids have problems outside of drugs and broken homes.
wildwest sorry you are going through this with you daughter. Been through a couple renditions with our kids also. No perfect options out there other than informed consent and lots of checking in on them. Some of the best ones are real power hogs so if they are away from home for the day can kill the battery. Our oldest is tech savvy and knows how to break into most parental controls. Perfect example is wanted to listen to music after the phone shut off for the night. Downloaded music, set said music as an alarm then turned alarm on so it would play until ready for bed!
I think you’re on the right track. In my opinion and experience, a phone is more dangerous than giving my child a gun. All that means is solid training, starting small and moving to where they can be trusted to use the tool without causing harm. Accidents still happen and just be worked thru and talked thru. We have Verizon and added a family safety program thru them (I don’t recall what it’s called at the moment) and my 18 yo still can’t download any app without Verizon getting my approval. This may be hackable I’m sure, but we haven’t had huge issues since implementing all this. I do check history, what apps have been used the most, etc about weekly or as desired. too many parents don’t teach safe phone/tech use and just hope for the best. Keep up the good fight
Not sure how an alarm can sound off when the phone is turned off plus what's wrong with listening to music? I prefer internet listening over radio just because of the commercials
It doesn’t shut off but it shuts down access to apps, games, texting, phone calls except emergency contacts, and so on at a certain time each evening. Music by itself is not good or bad the message that is conveyed or the singer is the issue. Kids have not learned self control and discipline. They don’t need unlimited access to all the stuff that is out there after bedtime!
Obviously music affects our moods and feelings. Better to try and learn and understand with your kids than just say no, it's not good for you. Edit to add to this thought: I used to fall asleep listening to my walkman and headphones turned all the way up with some crazy loud rock blasting. It was the only thing that would drowned out my own thoughts. I don't have kids so my opinions don't matter much but understanding goes so much further than telling me what to do. Edit: Adding to this thought. It's like when a child asks an adult "why" and the best they can come up with is "because i said so." Best i can figure is said adult has no clue why they do most of what they do. If that's true then they definitely don't have a reason why someone else should do something.
Is it OK to say I really liked having 2 wall princess phones in the house when our boys were growing up. The only upgrade I did was moving from rotary dialing to push button (DTMF)
