In loving memory of Kenis D. Keathley 6/4/81 - 3/27/22 Loving father, husband, brother, friend and firewood hoarder Rest in peace, Dexterday

Your best dad jokes...

Discussion in 'Everything Else (off topic)' started by brenndatomu, Nov 18, 2023.

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  1. metalcuttr

    metalcuttr

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    My bad! Maybe this should go in the "What's on the Grill or Smoker" thread. My apologies.
     
    metalcuttr, Mar 29, 2024
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  2. Eric VW

    Eric VW Moderator

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    No worries… this is the expected norm at FHC.
    :handshake:
     
    Eric VW, Mar 29, 2024
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  3. wildwest

    wildwest Moderator

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    :Yar:

    :rofl: :lol:

    Absolutey true Eric :)
     
    wildwest, Mar 29, 2024
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  4. wildwest

    wildwest Moderator

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    Speaking of monkeys, I have 2 aunts born with the Rh+/- situation, both had transfusions. Grandpa told them they both had "monkey blood" and they believed into their 50's. I told them it was because of the Rhesus monkey test and neither of them believe me. Oh well.
     
    wildwest, Mar 29, 2024
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  5. T.Jeff Veal

    T.Jeff Veal

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    FB_IMG_1713312815404.jpg
     
    T.Jeff Veal, Apr 17, 2024
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  6. metalcuttr

    metalcuttr

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    Does anyone know who Alexander Graham Kowalski was?.............The worlds first telephone Pole!
     
    metalcuttr, Apr 17, 2024
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  7. Softwood

    Softwood

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    Okay, here’s a question for all you mind readers out there.
     
    Softwood, Apr 19, 2024
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  8. brenndatomu

    brenndatomu

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    Yup, sure do!
     
    brenndatomu, Apr 19, 2024
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  9. brenndatomu

    brenndatomu

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    Not really a dad joke, but not a funny pic either...and I'm the OP, so... :D
    "An old, blind Marine wanders into an all-girl biker bar by mistake.
    He finds his way to a bar stool and orders a shot of Jack Daniels.
    After sitting there for a while, he yells to the bartender, 'Hey, you wanna hear a blonde joke?'
    The bar immediately falls absolutely silent.
    In a very deep, husky voice, the woman next to him says,
    'Before you tell that joke I think it is only fair, given that you are blind, that you should know five things:
    1. The bartender is a blonde girl with a baseball bat.
    2. The bouncer is a blonde girl.
    3. I'm a 6-foot tall, 175-pound blonde woman with a black belt in karate.
    4. The woman sitting next to me is blonde and a professional weight lifter.
    5. The lady to your right is blonde and a professional wrestler.
    Now, think about it seriously, do you still wanna tell that blonde joke?'
    The blind Marine thinks for a second, shakes his head and mutters, 'No...not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times.'
     
    brenndatomu, Apr 19, 2024
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  10. buZZsaw BRAD

    buZZsaw BRAD

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    What do you call a woman who's had too much plastic surgery?

    Polly Ethylene

    BO
     
    buZZsaw BRAD, Apr 25, 2024
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  11. brenndatomu

    brenndatomu

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    [​IMG] :rofl: :lol:
     
    brenndatomu, May 19, 2024
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  12. buZZsaw BRAD

    buZZsaw BRAD

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    What did Arnold Schwarzenegger say when he was building something?

    "I need to go the the lumbaa yard for a tuba four! :doh:

    BO
     
    buZZsaw BRAD, May 19, 2024
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  13. brenndatomu

    brenndatomu

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    If you ever meet blacksmith in person, hang around for some "Ahnold" impressions around the campfire...best ever! :rofl: :lol: :thumbs:
     
    brenndatomu, May 19, 2024
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  14. buZZsaw BRAD

    buZZsaw BRAD

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    My alter ego is Ahnold. I drive my family nuts with impersonating him.
     
    buZZsaw BRAD, May 19, 2024
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  15. Warner

    Warner

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    Why did Adel cross the road?


    To say “Hello, from the other side”
     
    Warner, May 20, 2024
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  16. Softwood

    Softwood

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    What's brown and sticky??


    A stick...
     
    Softwood, May 24, 2024
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  17. wildwest

    wildwest Moderator

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    You really gotta hand it to short people,










    Because they can't reach it
     
    wildwest, May 26, 2024
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  18. yooperdave

    yooperdave

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    Believe what you want but I say things are looking up for short people. :confused:
     
    yooperdave, May 26, 2024
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  19. brenndatomu

    brenndatomu

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    This thread is really falling short of my expectations...:whistle:
     
    brenndatomu, May 26, 2024
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  20. yooperdave

    yooperdave

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    Hey, you have to admit it.....it's hard for short people to succeed.....they just can't reach their goals. :cool:
     
    yooperdave, May 26, 2024
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