I have met so many good folks on this FHC forum over the last year and I've seen the positive effects it can have. I could sure use some of that good karma these days for my son. He's been laid off... again... and it's really knocked the wind out of him this time. I think he's now lost some of his strength to get back up... and it's really getting to this ole Dad. He and I are very tight, and he always shows tons of love and respect to his Mom and I. He's a hard worker and never shys away from going the extra mile to get a job done. Life throws curves at all of us and he knows this too. I was just hoping maybe a few of you might have a positive thought you could post here that might help him get his feet back under him. A story, an experience, prayers... all would be helpful. I posted a thread a while back that involved him a lot. He did 3/4 of the work on our cabin back in 2011. We never would have gotten it built that summer without him. Here's the link to that story. Thanks guys! http://firewoodhoardersclub.com/forums/threads/our-little-cabin-in-the-woods-pics-of-the-build.4314/
Sorry to hear this Stinny. Just tell him to look at his dad for inspiration. We all go through tough stuff, and we're still here. There used to be a scoring thing floating around regarding stressful life experiences, and being laid off would have to be up there along with the death of a loved one, moving, marriage, divorce....etc. Might sound cliche, but it's not how many times you get knocked down, it's how many times you get back up. He'll get back up. We've been through some stuff the last few years that I thought would NEVER happen to me. Didn't think my nerves would take it, and I'm a pretty laid back person. I'm still here, just like you are. Does he have any prospects for another job? Maybe he could do something in another field for a while. Any chance he could move back in......? We've done that too for one of ours who's always had a tough time finding a way through life. More than happy to do a convo in pm if you want.
Tough break. I feel useless without a job. Tell him there will be others, chin up. Hope it all works out soon for him.
You are awesome Papadave! Just reading your post makes me want to get up and hit things head on. Last 2 years have been challenging for us too. Lost our home and everything we owned from a housefire. Had to move obviously, 100 miles away just to find affordable housing not affected by the oil boom. Three family members have passed, another (MIL) battling cancer. Health issues myself due to all the above. Continued health issues for my wife. Financial challenges. ETC...... You are absolutely right, we may not be ready for life's challenges when they happen but how we rebound from them is what shapes our lives, strengthens our relationships and our faith. Prayers heading your way Stinny!
Tell him to keep his chin up I had foot surgery which most of u all ready know but the day I got home from the sur center my wife of 14yrs tells me she wants a divorce back in January her mom passed and she got a big inheritance when I asked her why I got no answer .my point is I sat for 8weeks pondering all this thinking it was my fault but my friends told me it's not they know what kind of person she is and her whole family is telling her she's makeing a huge mistake I felt like chit for a long time .i hit rock bottom but there is lite a the end of the tunnel. I have 3kids this has been hard on them . My kids make me so happy I'm a lot better know .it will get better for your son just think positive.
I almost forgot I what to say thanks to every one on this site for helping me get through this hole mess u are all Awsome people and I have upmost respect for all of u .thank u I can't go back to work till april15 .u guys and gals are awsome.
I was laid off 5 times in a 7 year period back in the 70's. I didn't think about the past, but looked at the future as a new beginning. I was laid off once again after 20 years with the same company. There is nothing that I could do, but go forward and look at it as a new adventure. You only harm yourself and loved ones by being depressed, because they are depressed enough by your loss. Good Luck going forward.
Is he physically active or his he laying around depressed? I know I feel a lot better when I am active and that's when I do my best thinking. I really think he needs to process some fire wood, that would make him feel gooder. What type of work does he do? Maybe he needs to move where the job market is better. Your son has a great dad , we all know that. Prayers for your son.
A wise man once told me something along the lines of this when I needed to hear it most. May not work for everyone, but it worked for me: You can have one of two attitudes about life: 1.) You play the cards you’re dealt. You take what life gives you and try to make the best hand out of it. Sometimes you take the house, sometimes the house takes you. 2.) You deal your own cards. You can’t always deal a winning hand, otherwise we’d all be billionaires sipping champagne from the deck of our yachts, but at least you don’t have to sit back and take what life gives you. Use this setback as motivation to be a dealer, not the guy getting 16 against the dealer’s King. If it were easy everybody would do it, but it isn’t hard enough that no one can do it.
To quote the great Wayne Gretzky, "You will always miss 100% of the shots you don't take" Tell him to get some new apps out, maybe consider a career change towards something more like "fun" rather than "work" and you know the rest of that saying "then you will never work a day in your life" Take some "shots" at employment he would consider fun and would have never previously considered.
My father did two things when times were tough. Multiple lay-offs over the years than after divorcing my mother. 1) get up, get dressed in decent clothes everyday regardless of the activities. 2)cook a tasty meal every night. Sounds so simple but always seemed like good advice.
Stinny, he needs to know that the priorities are 1) A strong circle of family (we already know he has this) and friends to support you. 2) Health- If you have your health, it is a great day no matter what. 3) Things like jobs are never a sure thing. If you are ambitious and willing to be flexible, you will find something that will pay off. If your not afraid to work, YOU WILL survive. He may have to defer to something else for a while but eventually he will find his nitch in the job market. The most important thing is to stay active and stay positive.
Most of us have had a few job issues over the years, especially with stiff domestic and global competition, business changes more quickly than ever. I see very good people laid off or downsized through no fault of there own all the time. It's almost inevitable that people have multiple companies that they will work for in their careers. How someone deals with these changes and overcomes them to move on to an even better job and company is the key in viewing the situation at hand. I would be putting my faith in God to watch over him and his family through this time and to give him the strength and perserverience to take this challenge head on, with a positive outlook and with a vengeance to succeed. Everything we do in life is a learning experience for our next chapter in life. He has a great opportunity to improve his life by finding the next job/career that will be rewarding for him and his family. Many, many times these forced job changes result in someone saying, "looking back that was the best thing that ever happened to me.... "
My thoughts are with you and your family. Laid off is a bummer for sure. My kids have been through it. They are back up and running. Daughter in law finished college a year ago, still hasn't found work. If your son is like you, he will get through this. Slim pick'ins out there but there is work.
