In loving memory of Kenis D. Keathley 6/4/81 - 3/27/22 Loving father, husband, brother, friend and firewood hoarder Rest in peace, Dexterday

Your best dad jokes...

Discussion in 'Everything Else (off topic)' started by brenndatomu, Nov 18, 2023.

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  1. MikeInMa

    MikeInMa

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    How much was Santa charged for parking?




    Nothing - it was on the house.
     
    MikeInMa, Dec 19, 2024
    #241 Top
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  2. yooperdave

    yooperdave

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    Where do cowboys cook their meals?





    On the range. :p
     
    yooperdave, Jan 8, 2025
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  3. Sicilian Suspect

    Sicilian Suspect

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    Did you hear about the Polish Olympian that won a gold medal???



    He was so happy, he had it bronzed!
     
    Sicilian Suspect, Jan 10, 2025
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  4. brenndatomu

    brenndatomu

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    Recently got thrown out of the local park for lining up all their squirrels according to height...said they didn't like my critter sizing...
     
    brenndatomu, Feb 24, 2025
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  5. T.Jeff Veal

    T.Jeff Veal

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    FB_IMG_1740443965284.jpg
     
    T.Jeff Veal, Feb 25, 2025
    #245 Top
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  6. yooperdave

    yooperdave

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    What is the number one use for pigskin?















    Covering the outside of a pig. :p
     
    yooperdave, Feb 26, 2025
    #246 Top
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  7. Sirchopsalot

    Sirchopsalot

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    Outside of a dog, a book is a man's best friend.
    Inside a dog, its too dark to read.
     
    Sirchopsalot, Mar 5, 2025
    #247 Top
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  8. buZZsaw BRAD

    buZZsaw BRAD

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    If you were trapped in an elephants stomach, how would you get out?

    Keep running and running and running until you're all pooped out!
     
    buZZsaw BRAD, Mar 5, 2025
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  9. buZZsaw BRAD

    buZZsaw BRAD

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    They were out of clay pigeons at the skeet range and substituted cow patties instead.

    Guess it was a crap shoot!

    BO
     
    Last edited: Mar 8, 2025
    buZZsaw BRAD, Mar 8, 2025
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  10. brenndatomu

    brenndatomu

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    Screenshot_20250308-205951.png
     
    brenndatomu, Mar 8, 2025
    #250 Top
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  11. metalcuttr

    metalcuttr

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    The 13 going on 35 year old girl from next door came over while I was working on the boat. "Are you getting ready to go fishing" she asked? "Yes, out here in the Sound" says me. "What kind of fish?" "Lingcod" I replied. "Are you going to bring some "Preparation H" to put on your bait to attract them" she asked? "Why in the world would I put hemorrhoid ointment on my bait" I queried? "Well, you are trying to catch Bottom Fish she replied!:picard:.......She has probably been listening to some of buZZsaw BRAD 's jokes! (This is a true story)
     
    metalcuttr, Mar 9, 2025
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  12. yooperdave

    yooperdave

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    She's a good one!
     
    yooperdave, Mar 10, 2025
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  13. buZZsaw BRAD

    buZZsaw BRAD

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    What do you call a female personal injury lawyer?

    Sue

    BO
     
    buZZsaw BRAD, Mar 17, 2025
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  14. buZZsaw BRAD

    buZZsaw BRAD

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    Did it hit the spot? No wait it was Spot! :rofl: :lol:
     
    buZZsaw BRAD, Mar 17, 2025
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  15. MikeInMa

    MikeInMa

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    MikeInMa, Mar 22, 2025
    #255 Top
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  16. buZZsaw BRAD

    buZZsaw BRAD

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    Why don't you tell an egg a joke?

    It might crack it up!

    BO

    Why was the guy standing on one leg at the ATM? He was checking his balance
     
    buZZsaw BRAD, Mar 26, 2025
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  17. billb3

    billb3

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    Did he let her know she is a keeper ?
     
    billb3, Mar 27, 2025
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  18. buZZsaw BRAD

    buZZsaw BRAD

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    What do you call a crocodile detective...

    ...an investigator!

    BO
     
    buZZsaw BRAD, Mar 29, 2025
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  19. brenndatomu

    brenndatomu

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    FIFY :D
     
    brenndatomu, Mar 29, 2025
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  20. brenndatomu

    brenndatomu

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    Recently replaced our rooster with a duck...now we always wake up at the quack of dawn! :D
     
    brenndatomu, Apr 7, 2025
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