In loving memory of Kenis D. Keathley 6/4/81 - 3/27/22 Loving father, husband, brother, friend and firewood hoarder Rest in peace, Dexterday

Your best dad jokes...

Discussion in 'Everything Else (off topic)' started by brenndatomu, Nov 18, 2023.

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  1. buZZsaw BRAD

    buZZsaw BRAD

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    I remember those from Catholic school.
     
    buZZsaw BRAD, Dec 14, 2023
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  2. Canadian border VT

    Canadian border VT

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    I got kicked out of catholic school..
    A not catholic
    B teacher hit me with ruler.

    I threw chair at her…
    I guess I got anger issues
     
    Canadian border VT, Dec 14, 2023
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  3. buZZsaw BRAD

    buZZsaw BRAD

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    :eek: Ill try to stay on your good side! :handshake:
     
    buZZsaw BRAD, Dec 14, 2023
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  4. Canadian border VT

    Canadian border VT

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    I am no threat; treat me fair; shoot straight
    We have no issues;
    I grew up in blue collar town with disabilities; got chit, a lot… why I live with 1/4 mile drive way :cool:

    :handshake: Come on up any time:handshake:
     
    Canadian border VT, Dec 14, 2023
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  5. Hammerhead20

    Hammerhead20

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    Made it to 7th grade where I had the nun from HE!!. She nailed me with one of those wooden rulers with the steel edge. I gave her a push start through the coat room doors. That was on a friday. Come monday morning I restarted my education in the public sector and never looked back. Amazing how many stories you hear about those religious zealots repeatly taking their brand of discipline to ridiculous levels.
     
    Hammerhead20, Dec 15, 2023
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  6. Canadian border VT

    Canadian border VT

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    In my case I would not say zealot, with age hindsight;
    Kid teased me, I reacted, she responded to my reaction. I perceived whole world against me, then way over reacted..

    regretted later kids from catholic school in knowledge and education had better education
     
    Canadian border VT, Dec 15, 2023
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  7. Hammerhead20

    Hammerhead20

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    All I can say is perceptions are like opinions, everybody has one
     
    Hammerhead20, Dec 15, 2023
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  8. Hammerhead20

    Hammerhead20

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    409320564_122129123714080182_1790244344969800125_n.jpg
     
    Hammerhead20, Dec 16, 2023
    #128 Top
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  9. buZZsaw BRAD

    buZZsaw BRAD

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    Its a ten minute walk from my house to the local bar.
    From the local bar to my house the walk is 45 minutes.

    The difference is staggering.
     
    buZZsaw BRAD, Dec 18, 2023
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  10. Warner

    Warner

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    Last night I had a dream I was a muffler on a a Maserati, woke up exhausted…
     
    Warner, Dec 18, 2023
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  11. buZZsaw BRAD

    buZZsaw BRAD

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    I had a dream i was eating a huge marshmallow. Woke up and my pillow was gone.
     
    buZZsaw BRAD, Dec 18, 2023
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  12. Softwood

    Softwood

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    Had a dream I was eating a bowl of Corn Flakes.
    Woke up and my grandmas scab collection was gone..
     
    Softwood, Dec 18, 2023
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  13. Eric Wanderweg

    Eric Wanderweg

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    Old Confucius say, man who take woman on camping trip have one in tent.
     
    Eric Wanderweg, Dec 18, 2023
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  14. Softwood

    Softwood

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    He who stand on toilet is high on pot.
     
    Softwood, Dec 18, 2023
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  15. buZZsaw BRAD

    buZZsaw BRAD

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    Confucious say: boy who go to sleep with stiff problem, ends up with solution in hand!
     
    buZZsaw BRAD, Dec 18, 2023
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  16. Eric Wanderweg

    Eric Wanderweg

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    LOL all the Confucius jokes I know are a little too edgy for this family-friendly space :)
     
    Eric Wanderweg, Dec 18, 2023
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  17. Warner

    Warner

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    Last night I had a dream I was a muffler on a Maserati, woke up exhausted.
     
    Warner, Dec 19, 2023
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  18. brenndatomu

    brenndatomu

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    So it's a reoccurring dream, huh? :rofl: :lol:
     
    brenndatomu, Dec 19, 2023
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  19. Canadian border VT

    Canadian border VT

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    Same
     
    Canadian border VT, Dec 19, 2023
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  20. Warner

    Warner

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    Everybody knows that guy that tell the same dad jokes and stories over and over.
     
    Warner, Dec 19, 2023
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