Why I don't visit Firewood Hoarders Club very often

Members might notice that I don't visit FHC very often. There is a reason. I liked FHC a lot and there are a lot of great people here that I have met. Also some really great people that worked to help me get started; and I appreciate those people every day. I won't forget what those members did for me. Plus, I really like being part of a community and interacting with members of that community.

However, it got to where being here was stressing me out due to one member that to me was being a bully. Now I know what bullying feels like because I was bullied in High School; that was before the attention on bullying was made more public. The bullying in High School got to the point where it was taking a toll on me; my grades slipped, I dreaded going to school each day and I loved learning. I never talked with my parents about it though and just struggle through it until one day I snapped and attacked the person bullying me. The bullying stopped; maybe the bully realised that they may actually get hurt if they continued. The scuffle we had was minor but it gave a message to the bully that I was tired of just taking it.

Now the member here that is bullying me when I post or comment may not realise that what she/he is doing is bullying. I give them the benefit of the doubt. However, it is; what they are doing goes beyond just responding to my posts and comments. A lot of members have responded to my posts and comments but when they do so, it is not bullying; they are responding in sincere and thoughtful ways even when the comment might be a criticism. No, it is different for the member engaging in bullying because they are doing it in an attack sort of way.

I did engage with the member asking them to just ignore my posts and comments and I would also ignore their posts and comments. I would not leave comments on their posts and in return the person would not leave comments on my posts. I thought that would be an agreeable way to handle things. The member did not agree and continued to leave comments on my posts and comments; this is to be expected if the person is trying to be nasty. I contacted an admin of the site but they decided to not reprimand the member for what was a form of harassment or bullying. Well, they are the admins and what they say go. Maybe it was because the member in question had been a part of FHC a lot longer than me; I don't know.

When I was bullied in High School I had no out; I had to attend school. However, that is not the case with being bullied on FHC; I do have an out, I cannot visit the site; I can choose not to be here. Now I liked being here, I liked being a part of the FHC community. I loved the interaction and fun of engaging members; even, as I said above, those members criticised how I did something or disagreed with a point of view. It is a big difference between someone leaving real comments and someone leaving comments just to be nasty. I even noticed the person leaving nasty comments about me indirectly when I wasn't even engaging in the thread.

Now you may think I am being dramatic. However, I certainly felt the stress of being on the site and having to deal with the member. I also know that with limited engagement on FHC; and thus limited engagement with that member, that I feel much better and calmer. The downside is that I miss being a part of a great community and I do consider FHC a great community.

Take care everyone, I will drop in time to time to see how everyone is doing. Big hugs to all; heck, even big hugs to the bully.

 

I am sorry I can't give that a like. Nobody should have to put up with bullies. Have a good day.

 

Kimberly I gave it a like because sometimes it is necessary to call out bullies publicly and you did in a very respectful way and with a lot of grace.

 

Kimberly, I hope that telling us of your predicament brings some positive results. We all deserve to be treated with civility.