Rest In Peace - Another Cancer Sucks.

I've posted about my dad's successful battle with cancer, but I've neglected to post about my mother-n-laws. She was diagnosed with terminal liver cancer. Which liver cancer does not start in the liver. Typically it starts in the lungs. She was a life long heavy smoker.

In a week of record lows in RI, she lost her battle. Not much that could be done, but try to keep her comfortable. Hospice had her on a cocktail of morphine and Oxycodone. Not to be confused with the more powerful Oxycontin. Her stomach didn't tolerate the higher doses of Oxycontin. Unfortunately this cocktail did not stave off the pain, and she spent her final month in considerable pain.

I've heard two different explanations as to why Hospice was not giving her enough dosage to make her comfortable. Which means I need to do my research. One is that since she was in a facility, hospice has to follow my stringent guidelines set forth by the state of RI. If she were home, Hospice would have had a freer hand in giving her a higher dosage to make more comfortable. The second explanation is more generalized in that more stringent guidelines have been passed by our state and federal government controlling the amounts/timing of the dosage. This unfortunately ties Hospices hands in making the patient comfortable in the final weeks/hours. Which of these are true if either of them, I need to find out for myself. The amount of pain she was in was significant. I'd say a constant 7 every time I saw her.

My wife, her four brothers, the brothers wives and her grandchildren kept a steady flow of visitors in her room to help keep comfortable and see to her every need. One of her brother's was by her side 7 days X 16 hours. He stepped up big time in her time of need. Thankfully as my wife's job does not have that flexibility. Though she has been the one to be by her mother throughout all of this. She was very relieved to have her older brother to be there. Not suggesting this was a competition.

The morning she passed I was the only non-sibling in the room. It felt a bit odd as I was the only that had already been through this before with my mom. (Different circumstance though. My mom was in ICU and had been taken off life support. Bit of a drawn out story. Let's say she had a DNR, and the rescue did everything right. As an only child I had the unpleasant job of deciding to take her off, but it was her wishes I was following.) Her mom is now in a better place without all the pain and suffering.

 

Condolences to you and your wife.

 

Really sorry to hear about your MIL, my thoughts and prayers are with you and your family

 

Praying for Peace for you and your family.

 

I have an employee and the wife of an employee undergoing breast cancer treatment.

I ordered a new vehicle and kept this decal work a secret until it arrived. Yes cancer sucks. I am grateful for the treatment available these days. The fight must continue.

 

Sorry for your loss but remember the good times and share with the family.

 

May she rest in eternal peace. Cancer is a hideous disease that knows no boundaries.

 

boettg33 .. Thoughts and prayers to your family. Been there with my mom, it's ok to feel relieved when their suffering is over.

 

Sorry for your loss

 

My condolences to you, your wife, and her entire family. I don't know why, when there is no hope and only pain, the authorities have to put their noses into what can/cannot be done. So sad - I'm sure the pain affected not only her, but everyone who knew what pain she was in. I hope you all can find comfort in knowing the pain is over.

 

I'm sorry that your MIL couldn't get the pain relief she needed. You as a family did everything you could for her, but medical rules and protocol can be impenetrable. You can question why and get some explanations, and maybe the information will be useful down the road. My experience with hospice was that they are very sensitive to the grieving process, and if this is something your family needs to work though, they will respond.

 

So sorry to hear of the loss, and the pain she went through.

Her suffering is done, may she now rest peacefully.

A loss is always difficult for those who must endure, but endure we must.

Best wishes to you and your wife, and the family.

 

Sorry for your loss, cancer is devastating. The government has dragged everyone into the opium war including those with a definite need. Our thoughts are with you.

 

My wife and her brothers found the one assigned to her mother to be very good. The ones that would come when off shift were hit or miss. Overall they get that hospice did all they could and were grateful for them.

 

My condolences. Cancer took both of my parents as well.

 

Sorry for your loss boettg33. Praying for comfort and peace for you and your family.

 

Yep, it sucks. I lost a great friend at 5:30 today, Simon J. (Joe) Williams, Burlington, KY. Lung cancer took him out. The last the last thing he told me was: "I tired of fighting. I wanna get off the chemo and oxygen, just go to sleep and not wake up." That's pretty much what he did today. Thanks Joe, my life is better because you were in it.

 

Sorry for your loss. May memories of how he made your life better comfort you in your time of sorrow.

 

Sorry you lost your friend.