You might be a firewood hoarder if.....

Your neighbors refer to you as the "Firewood Guy"

Met a guy helping one of my neighbors that is fixing his pasture fence line so this newly met individual could keep his horse there and the neighbor told the individual don't worry about the trees the "Firewood Guy" up the road will take care of the big stuff. (If this sentence makes absolutely no sense I understand)

My closer neighbor ~600yds through the woods calls tonight and is planning on hiring a tree company to drop ~8 trees he thinks they are oak/sweetgum but 3 are hickory, 2 maple, 3 red oak, 1 gum
:firepit:
If you wish to add to the "Foxworthiness" of this please feel free to continue or sticky it

 

Your don't need a fence because your wood stacks define your property lines and keep your pets and children in.

 

You have to explain to your significant other what you're looking at on the computer is another guy or gals wood.

edited to include the gals as we have few very competent ones here - thumbs up to the ladies

 

You have so much firewood, everyone thinks you're a dealer.
You have so much firewood, everyone thinks you can spare some for them......for free.
You have so much firewood, everyone thinks it'll rot before you can burn it all (see above for proof of this erroneous mindset).

 

I might be a Firewood hoarder iffen I could ever get off this darn Forum and get to work! Oh well there is always next year!

Gary

 

Your wife gets made at you because when you go on a Sunday drive with the family you take your binoculars, chainsaw and gas with you.

 

Now that's my problem, I always have gas just no saw with me!

Gary

 

You stop on the roadside and pick up a round of red oak that fell off a truck... We've all done it admit it

 

You can see your house from the road when you should see firewood and you are ashamed.

 

That's acceptable cause I can't see my house from the road by next week once the trees/shrubs fully bloom out - if I attempted to encircle the 12acres with a wood wall I'd probably believe I had a problem.....

Visitors remark on your wood pile stacks and think they are so neat - like a bunker wall on the edge of your main lawn area???

 

I've stopped to pick up a couple of splits.

 

Where's the problem with this? We've all been there that's why we're here right.

 

You've been given the nickname "Woody" by your wife and friends.
Your neighbors play pranks like telling you the US Forest Service came by and wants you to return all of the wood you scrounged.

 

If you can spot stacks of firewood while traveling 60 miles per hour down the road.
If the stack is with in 100 yards you can ID the wood type.

If the sound of a running chainsaw attracts you to it like a bear to honey.

 

Your stacks are so big that the building inspector requires a permit.

 

...You know how many rounds your wife's car will hold.
...Your car/truck has never had a full tank of gas, but your chainsaw always has.
...Your property has been mistaken for a log yard.
...Your wood-splitter has a cup holder.

 

When your 4 year old daughter is in the carseat..... We drive past some firewood stacked close to the road.... And she says " Daddy.... They didnt ask you if it was ok to do that !!!" Thats when i knew i may have a so called " problem"

 

...when you go into the Moose Lodge they refer to you as The Wood Whore."

 

If your morning coffee honestly tastes better with a few chips of maple wood fresh off the saw dancing around the rim of the cup!! LOL

 

… I got nuthin…