In loving memory of Kenis D. Keathley 6/4/81 - 3/27/22 Loving father, husband, brother, friend and firewood hoarder Rest in peace, Dexterday
  1. The Annual Tradition is Back!!!! It's time for our Annual Firewood Hoarders Club Secret Santa Gift Exchange! Deadline is: Sign Up will be closed on Saturday November 9th at Midnight (central time) Official FHC 2024 Secret Santa Gift Exchange

Your best dad jokes...

Discussion in 'Everything Else (off topic)' started by brenndatomu, Nov 18, 2023.

Page 6 of 12
  1. Hammerhead20

    Hammerhead20

    Joined:
    Mar 7, 2023
    Messages:
    1,473
    Likes Received:
    12,248
    Location:
    Ontario
    406814840_1105710667531748_3618165386592351762_n.jpg
     
    Hammerhead20, Dec 3, 2023
    #101 Top
    John D, Chaz, Moparguy and 4 others like this.
  2. Hammerhead20

    Hammerhead20

    Joined:
    Mar 7, 2023
    Messages:
    1,473
    Likes Received:
    12,248
    Location:
    Ontario
    407350530_10224946720044570_6644729263204049630_n.jpg
     
    Hammerhead20, Dec 5, 2023
    #102 Top
    Chaz, Moparguy, wildwest and 4 others like this.
  3. BC Doug Fir

    BC Doug Fir

    Joined:
    Nov 25, 2020
    Messages:
    119
    Likes Received:
    815
    Location:
    Cariboo BC
    True story. My son who was about 10 at the time and I were helping a good friend cut and wrap a moose. When we got finished we went in for coffee and snacks. He said “ here try the pepperoni I got made “. I don’t like much hot spicy food. I asked him if it would give me a sore azz. Before he could reply my kid said “you’re supposed to put it in your mouth dad”. Gotta love them moments.
     
    BC Doug Fir, Dec 6, 2023
    #103 Top
    Chaz, Moparguy, Hammerhead20 and 8 others like this.
  4. wood and coal burner

    wood and coal burner

    Joined:
    Sep 21, 2018
    Messages:
    211
    Likes Received:
    1,297
    Location:
    Quakertown,PA
    A woman with no arms or legs on the ceiling?

    Crystal

    A man with no arms or legs in the water

    Bob

    A man with no arms or legs on the wall

    Art

    A man with no arms or legs in a test tube

    Gene

    A man with no arms on legs on stage

    Mike

    This is pathetic
     
    wood and coal burner, Dec 6, 2023
    #104 Top
    Chaz, Moparguy, Hammerhead20 and 3 others like this.
  5. Erik B

    Erik B

    Joined:
    May 12, 2015
    Messages:
    5,072
    Likes Received:
    34,216
    Location:
    Western Wisconsin
    What can go up the chimney down,
    Down the chimney down,
    But can't go up the chimney up
    Or down the chimney up?


    An umbrella
     
    Erik B, Dec 6, 2023
    #105 Top
    Chaz, Moparguy, Hammerhead20 and 2 others like this.
  6. wildwest

    wildwest Moderator

    Joined:
    Jul 21, 2014
    Messages:
    28,809
    Likes Received:
    132,173
    Location:
    Wyoming high plains
    Say this 3 times fast

    Rubber Baby Buggy Bumpers
     
    wildwest, Dec 6, 2023
    #106 Top
    Chaz, Moparguy, Hammerhead20 and 1 other person like this.
  7. Hammerhead20

    Hammerhead20

    Joined:
    Mar 7, 2023
    Messages:
    1,473
    Likes Received:
    12,248
    Location:
    Ontario
    408872805_10232623555198485_4173636356484142136_n.jpg
     
    Hammerhead20, Dec 7, 2023
    #107 Top
    Chaz, Moparguy, wildwest and 1 other person like this.
  8. Canadian border VT

    Canadian border VT

    Joined:
    Feb 18, 2015
    Messages:
    17,203
    Likes Received:
    111,653
    Location:
    Vermont
    Why did golfer have 2 pairs of pants?

    Yes he had a hole in one…
     
    Canadian border VT, Dec 7, 2023
    #108 Top
    Chaz, Moparguy, Hammerhead20 and 3 others like this.
  9. Hammerhead20

    Hammerhead20

    Joined:
    Mar 7, 2023
    Messages:
    1,473
    Likes Received:
    12,248
    Location:
    Ontario
    409219105_10232414314845006_4288878612469952847_n.jpg
     
    Hammerhead20, Dec 9, 2023
    #109 Top
    Chaz, Moparguy, yooperdave and 5 others like this.
  10. buZZsaw BRAD

    buZZsaw BRAD

    Joined:
    Feb 14, 2019
    Messages:
    29,378
    Likes Received:
    175,398
    Location:
    North Haven, Connecticut
    What can run but never gets anywhere?

    your nose! BO
     
    buZZsaw BRAD, Dec 9, 2023
    #110 Top
    John D, Chaz, Moparguy and 4 others like this.
  11. Erik B

    Erik B

    Joined:
    May 12, 2015
    Messages:
    5,072
    Likes Received:
    34,216
    Location:
    Western Wisconsin
    Sometimes people are built upside down...their feet smell and their nose runs.
     
    Erik B, Dec 9, 2023
    #111 Top
    Chaz, Moparguy, wildwest and 4 others like this.
  12. wildwest

    wildwest Moderator

    Joined:
    Jul 21, 2014
    Messages:
    28,809
    Likes Received:
    132,173
    Location:
    Wyoming high plains
    Say this 3 times fast

    Chicken Biscuit Triscuit
     
    wildwest, Dec 9, 2023
    #112 Top
    Chaz, Moparguy, Hammerhead20 and 1 other person like this.
  13. buZZsaw BRAD

    buZZsaw BRAD

    Joined:
    Feb 14, 2019
    Messages:
    29,378
    Likes Received:
    175,398
    Location:
    North Haven, Connecticut
    I adopted a homeless horse. I wanted it to be in a stable environment!
     
    buZZsaw BRAD, Dec 9, 2023
    #113 Top
    Chaz, Moparguy and Hammerhead20 like this.
  14. Hammerhead20

    Hammerhead20

    Joined:
    Mar 7, 2023
    Messages:
    1,473
    Likes Received:
    12,248
    Location:
    Ontario
    410459311_10220661278955760_741792970082932261_n.jpg
     
    Hammerhead20, Dec 14, 2023
    #114 Top
    Hinerman, Chaz, Moparguy and 5 others like this.
  15. JiminyKicket

    JiminyKicket

    Joined:
    Feb 26, 2022
    Messages:
    581
    Likes Received:
    4,206
    Location:
    Seattle
    My dog swallowed a bunch of Scrabble letters. I took him to the vet, but no word yet.
     
    JiminyKicket, Dec 14, 2023
    #115 Top
    Chaz, Moparguy, metalcuttr and 5 others like this.
  16. buZZsaw BRAD

    buZZsaw BRAD

    Joined:
    Feb 14, 2019
    Messages:
    29,378
    Likes Received:
    175,398
    Location:
    North Haven, Connecticut
    :rofl: :lol: :thumbs:
     
    buZZsaw BRAD, Dec 14, 2023
    #116 Top
    Chaz, metalcuttr, brenndatomu and 1 other person like this.
  17. brenndatomu

    brenndatomu

    Joined:
    May 29, 2015
    Messages:
    21,591
    Likes Received:
    136,183
    Location:
    NE Ohio
    Been slackin here I guess... :emb:

    -What’s Forrest Gump’s password? 1forrest1.

    -I used to run a dating service for chickens. But I was struggling to make hens meet.

    -If prisoners could take their own mug shots…They’d be called cellfies.
     
    brenndatomu, Dec 14, 2023
    #117 Top
    Chaz, Moparguy, MikeInMa and 2 others like this.
  18. Warner

    Warner

    Joined:
    Jun 19, 2017
    Messages:
    6,883
    Likes Received:
    43,797
    Location:
    New Hampshire
    Why is Santa so good at martial arts?

    cuz he has a black belt.

    which is Santa’s cleanest raindeer?

    comet.
     
    Warner, Dec 14, 2023
    #118 Top
    Chaz, Moparguy, buZZsaw BRAD and 2 others like this.
  19. metalcuttr

    metalcuttr

    Joined:
    Jun 12, 2018
    Messages:
    3,112
    Likes Received:
    22,189
    Location:
    western WA
    Did you hear of the dyslexic, agnostic, insomniac who would lay awake all night pondering whether there really was a dog?

    Or the man who was so distraught over having dyslexia that he threw himself behind a bus?
     
    metalcuttr, Dec 14, 2023
    #119 Top
    Chaz, Moparguy and brenndatomu like this.
  20. Canadian border VT

    Canadian border VT

    Joined:
    Feb 18, 2015
    Messages:
    17,203
    Likes Received:
    111,653
    Location:
    Vermont
    Comet will make your teeth turn green
    Comet Tastes like gasoline
    Comet Will make you vomit

    so eat comet and vomit today
     
    Canadian border VT, Dec 14, 2023
    #120 Top
    Chaz, Moparguy, MikeInMa and 2 others like this.
Page 6 of 12