In loving memory of Kenis D. Keathley 6/4/81 - 3/27/22 Loving father, husband, brother, friend and firewood hoarder Rest in peace, Dexterday

Christmas Humor

Discussion in 'Everything Else (off topic)' started by UncleJoe, Dec 22, 2015.

  1. UncleJoe

    UncleJoe

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  2. Greenstick

    Greenstick

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    I threatened something similar to a bad neighbor who let their dog run and it would come poop on my steps. The officer said I would be charged with vandalism and public indecency if I followed through with my offer to return the service on the neighbors deck as I had offered to him if they let their dog come to my yard again. Soooooooo glad they moved!
     
  3. rottiman

    rottiman

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    A buddy of mine had the same type neighbor problem. The diplomacy tact didn't work, so he implemented plan B. First time the dog dropped, he was out there with a shovel. He immediately launched it back over the lot line and against the Lt. blue vinyl siding of their house. Problem was soon solved, and the visits by the dog ceased..............
     
  4. Backwoods Savage

    Backwoods Savage Moderator

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    I did it many years ago. More than once too.
     
  5. jatoxico

    jatoxico

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    I'm seeing your avatar in a whole new light...
     
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  6. Star Gazer

    Star Gazer

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    So that's who has been pinching one off in my chimney every Christmas Eve! Here I was thinking it was an unseasoned Yule Log! :rofl: :lol:
     
  7. Scotty Overkill

    Scotty Overkill Administrator

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    You guys Crack me up......
     
  8. Scotty Overkill

    Scotty Overkill Administrator

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  9. thewoodlands

    thewoodlands

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  10. Stinny

    Stinny

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  11. yooperdave

    yooperdave

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    Had some skiers that would use a house a couple doors away during the ski season. Then they would use my driveway for their dog to make a deposit. First time I threw it over the snow bank and waited for them the next morning when they walked the turd dropper.
    Stood in the picture window and when the dog entered the driveway, they saw me, immediately looked away and jerked the dog by the leash to prevent the gifting occasion. Problem solved, right?
    Nope! Dealing with city folk here and typical skier attitude.
    A couple days later, while I was gone, the dog again left a package for me to dispose of. Yes, it was them as I followed the tracks straight to their house with a shovel full of dog droppings and left it right in front of their vehicles drivers door. Problem solved, right? Nope! Still one more time! This time I carried it down the street in the shovel and was actually laughing as they were outside and then quickly went inside. Carried it right to their doorstep. Any closer, and it would have been made a door sweep! Neighbor next to them saw the whole thing and was laughing too. Said they have always done that and are completely clueless. Stayed right there for about 1/2 hour (B S-ing with their neighbor), but they never came out...just looked out the windows a couple times. So far, problem solved!

    But I'm watching! Don't know how much closer I can return the favor!
     
  12. savemoney

    savemoney

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  13. TurboDiesel

    TurboDiesel

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    :faint: :rofl: :lol::rofl: :lol::rofl: :lol:
     
  14. Gary_602z

    Gary_602z

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    Put a baggie over your hand, pick it up and smear under the door handle of their car!

    Gary
     
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  15. jatoxico

    jatoxico

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    I know right!?
     
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  16. yooperdave

    yooperdave

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    I wouldn't think of doing that.
    I was laughing so hard, I was kinda glad I didn't see them because they probably would have thought I couldn't be serious since I was in a good mood about it!
     
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  17. savemoney

    savemoney

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    Husband and Wife Christmas Shopping
    A couple were in a busy shopping center just before Christmas. The wife suddenly noticed that her husband was missing and as they had a lot to do, so she called him on the mobile.
    The wife said " Where are you, you know we have lots to do."
    He said "You remember the jewelers we went into about 10 years ago, and you fell in love with that diamond necklace? I could not afford it at the time and I said that one day I would get it for you?"
    Little tears started to flow down her cheek and she got all
    choked up…
    "Yes, I do remember that shop." she replied.
    "Well I am in the gun shop next door to that."
     
  18. Backwoods Savage

    Backwoods Savage Moderator

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