In loving memory of Kenis D. Keathley 6/4/81 - 3/27/22 Loving father, husband, brother, friend and firewood hoarder Rest in peace, Dexterday

Sweet Dreams.................

Discussion in 'Everything Else (off topic)' started by rottiman, Oct 22, 2018.

  1. rottiman

    rottiman

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    Ray came home one night from a long day at work, slid into bed beside his sleeping wife, and fell into a deep slumber. He awoke before the Pearly Gates, where St. Peter said, 'You died in your sleep, Ray.


    Ray was stunned. 'I'm dead? No, I can't be! I've got too much to live for. Send me back!' St. Peter said, 'I'm sorry, but there's only one way you can go back, and that is as a chicken.'


    Ray was devastated, but begged St. Peter to send him to a farm near his home. The next thing he knew, he was covered with feathers, clucking and pecking the ground.


    A rooster strolled past. 'So, you're the new hen, huh? How's your first day here?' 'Not bad,' replied Ray the hen, 'but I have this strange feeling inside. Like I'm gonna explode!'


    'You're ovulating,' explained the rooster. 'Don't tell me you've never laid an egg before?' 'Never,' said Ray. 'Well, just relax and let it happen,' says the rooster. 'It's no big deal. He did, and a few uncomfortable seconds later, out popped an egg! He was overcome with emotion as he experienced motherhood. He soon laid another egg - his joy was overwhelming.


    As he was about to lay his third egg, he felt a smack on the back of his head, and heard.....


    "Ray, wake up! You chit the bed!"


    Getting OLD just isn't what they said it would be!
     
    Chris F, Chaz, jetjr and 10 others like this.
  2. yooperdave

    yooperdave

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    Is this where the "no chit" phrase is entered?


    :rofl: :lol::rofl: :lol::rofl: :lol::rofl: :lol:

    Keep on finding these rottiman !!
     
    wildwest, Chaz, Midwinter and 3 others like this.
  3. Jack Straw

    Jack Straw

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    Oh great! I’ll probably dream I’m a garden hose tonight.:doh:
     
    yooperdave, wildwest, Chaz and 5 others like this.
  4. papadave

    papadave

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    This came to mind (what little is left).............
     
  5. Midwinter

    Midwinter

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    I was thinking more along the lines of... 3EfmWGD.jpg
     
    wildwest, rottiman, Chaz and 3 others like this.
  6. ReelFaster

    ReelFaster

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  7. papadave

    papadave

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    I'm scarred. :picard:
     
  8. rottiman

    rottiman

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    .............and I'm SCARED !!!!!!!!!!!!!
     
  9. Mwalsh9152

    Mwalsh9152

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    I always wake up very nervous when I have have a dream about taking a leak