My Dad bought my Mom a piano for her birthday. A few weeks later, I asked how she was doing with it. "Oh," said My Dad, "I persuaded her to switch to a clarinet." "How come?" I asked. "Well," he answered, "because with a clarinet, she can't sing."
...........Brought home a case of the clap............asked my mother "what am I going to with this?"............... she said "put it in the closet, your father drinks anything.................................