A husband and wife are shopping in their local supermarket. The husband picks up a case of Budweiser and puts it in their cart. "What do you think you're doing?" asks the wife. "They're on sale, only $10 for 24 cans" he replies. "Put them back, we can't afford them" demands the wife, and they carry on shopping. A few aisles farther on, the woman picks up a $20 jar of face cream and puts it in the basket. "What do you think you're doing?" asks the husband. "It's my face cream. It makes me look beautiful," replies the wife. Her husband retorts: "So does 24 cans of Budweiser and it's half the price."
Wal Mart Greeter A very loud, unattractive, mean, nasty woman walked into Wal-Mart with her two kids, yelling obscenities at them all the way through the entrance. The Wal-Mart Greeter said pleasantly "Good morning, and welcome to Wal-Mart. Nice children you have there. Are they twins?" The ugly woman stopped yelling long enough to say, "Hell no they aren't. The oldest one's 9 and the other one's 7. Why the hell would you think they're twins? Are you blind, or just stupid?" "I'm neither blind nor stupid, Ma'am," replied the greeter. "I just couldn't believe someone would sleep with you twice." "Have a good day and thank you for shopping at Wal-Mart ."
For real. I said something similar to my manager in the early 1990's, nothing foul, but as equally as degrading and true. It was his sister. Nope, never did recover a good relationship with him. And the name Walmart was included in my comments.
Reminds me of the time I told a lady at work "you know, you shouldn't eat raw onions when you're pregnant." Well you can guess the rest of the story.
