In loving memory of Kenis D. Keathley 6/4/81 - 3/27/22 Loving father, husband, brother, friend and firewood hoarder Rest in peace, Dexterday

Your best dad jokes...

Discussion in 'Everything Else (off topic)' started by brenndatomu, Nov 18, 2023.

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  1. brenndatomu

    brenndatomu

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    Not everyone will get that one...
     
    brenndatomu, Apr 8, 2026
    #381 Top
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  2. JD Guy

    JD Guy

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    Being of sound mind and limited hearing skills I understand perfectly :rofl: :lol:
     
    JD Guy, Apr 8, 2026
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  3. stoveliker

    stoveliker

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    I just built an ATM that only gives out coins. I don’t know why no one’s thought of it before: it just makes cents!
     
    stoveliker, Apr 11, 2026
    #383 Top
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  4. stoveliker

    stoveliker

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    Very disappointed in my universal remote control.


    It doesn't control the universe.
    Not even remotely.
     
    stoveliker, Apr 11, 2026
    #384 Top
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  5. stoveliker

    stoveliker

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    What do you call a factory that makes okay products?





    A satisfactory.
     
    stoveliker, Apr 12, 2026
    #385 Top
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  6. Noth

    Noth

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    What’s the #1 cause of dry skin?






    Towels.
     
    Noth, Apr 13, 2026 at 10:15 AM
    #386 Top
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  7. brenndatomu

    brenndatomu

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    What do you call a teacher who doesn’t fart in public?



    A private tooter.
     
    brenndatomu, Apr 13, 2026 at 6:55 PM
    #387 Top
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  8. MikeInMa

    MikeInMa

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    I bought some alligator meat at the market last weekend. I brought it home and realized I couldn’t cook it. All I had was a Croc Pot.
     
    MikeInMa, Apr 15, 2026 at 7:49 AM
    #388 Top
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  9. billb3

    billb3

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    Where do pirates go to get their hooks ?



    The second hand store.
     
    billb3, Apr 15, 2026 at 6:38 PM
    #389 Top
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  10. Backwoods Savage

    Backwoods Savage Moderator

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    Why do people use the term, "Sweating like a hog?" Hogs don't sweat.
     
    Backwoods Savage, Apr 16, 2026 at 9:07 AM
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  11. Canadian border VT

    Canadian border VT

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    Grandmother horses sweat, men perspire and women merely glow.. fond memories
     
    Canadian border VT, Apr 16, 2026 at 9:45 AM
    #391 Top
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  12. metalcuttr

    metalcuttr

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    Both my Grandfather and Father, who were both Gentlemen, repeated this many times!:handshake:
     
    metalcuttr, Apr 16, 2026 at 1:36 PM
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  13. yooperdave

    yooperdave

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    Yeah, right!

    And we all know............


    [​IMG]
     
    yooperdave, Apr 16, 2026 at 7:14 PM
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  14. Jeffrey Svoboda

    Jeffrey Svoboda

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    If they did it would smell like roses. Duh!!! :smoke:
     
    Jeffrey Svoboda, Apr 16, 2026 at 7:21 PM
    #394 Top
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