In loving memory of Kenis D. Keathley 6/4/81 - 3/27/22 Loving father, husband, brother, friend and firewood hoarder Rest in peace, Dexterday

Yet Another Funny Picture Thread (3rd attempt)

Discussion in 'Everything Else (off topic)' started by yooperdave, Feb 7, 2020.

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  1. XXL

    XXL

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    I have a way to go. Having a hard time getting past 27 beers....:drunk:
     
    XXL, Dec 1, 2020
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  2. Loon

    Loon

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    What! You started to diet? :rootintootin: :coldone:
     
    Loon, Dec 1, 2020
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  3. billb3

    billb3

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    80+40= 120
    your age + the year you were born = 120
     
    billb3, Dec 1, 2020
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  4. Loon

    Loon

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    :hair: I gotta quit drinking! :coldone:
     
    Loon, Dec 1, 2020
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  5. eatonpcat

    eatonpcat

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    Rookie!!
     
    eatonpcat, Dec 1, 2020
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  6. eatonpcat

    eatonpcat

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    80 - 56 = 24 + 40 = 64
     
    eatonpcat, Dec 1, 2020
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  7. billb3

    billb3

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    Use a funnel !!!
     
    billb3, Dec 1, 2020
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  8. Loon

    Loon

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    Now ya got me a thinking.:cheers:

    [​IMG]
     
    Loon, Dec 1, 2020
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  9. wildwest

    wildwest Moderator

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    It does :eek:
     
    wildwest, Dec 1, 2020
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  10. XXL

    XXL

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    Immutable Laws

    1.Law of Mechanical Repair
    After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch and you'll have to pee.

    2.Law of Gravity
    Any tool, nut, bolt, screw, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible place in the universe.

    3.Law of Probability
    The probability of being watched is directly proportional to the stupidity of your act.

    4.Law of Random Numbers
    If you dial a wrong number, you never get a busy signal; someone always answers.

    5.Variation Law
    If you change lines (or traffic lanes), the one you were in will always move faster than the one you are in now.

    6.Law of the Bath
    When the body is fully immersed in water, the telephone will ring.

    7.Law of Close Encounters
    The probability of meeting someone you know INCREASES dramatically when you are with someone you don't want to be seen with.

    8.Law of the Result
    When you try to prove to someone that a machine won't work, IT WILL!!!

    9.Law of Biomechanics
    The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the reach.

    10.Law of the Theaters & Sports Arenas - At any event, the people whose seats are furthest from the aisle, always arrive last. They are the ones who will leave their seats several times to go for food, beer, or the toilet and who leave early before the end of the performance or the game is over. The folks in the aisle seats come early, never move once, have long gangly legs or big bellies and stay to the bitter end of the performance. The aisle people also are very surly folk.

    11.The Coffee Law
    As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee is cold.

    12.Murphy's Law of Lockers
    If there are only 2 people in a locker room, they will have adjacent lockers.

    13.Law of Physical Surfaces
    The chances of an open-faced jelly sandwich landing face down on a floor are directly correlated to the newness and cost of the carpet or rug.

    14.Law of Logical Argument
    Anything is possible IF you don't know what you are talking about.

    15. Law of Physical Appearance
    If the clothes fit, they're ugly.

    16.Law of Public Speaking
    A closed mouth gathers no feet!

    17.Law of Commercial Marketing Strategy-
    As soon as you find a product that you really like, they will stop making it OR the store will stop selling it!

    18.Doctors' Law
    If you don't feel well, make an appointment to go to the doctor, by the time you get there, you'll feel better. But don't make an appointment and you'll stay sick.
     
    XXL, Dec 2, 2020
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  11. yooperdave

    yooperdave

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    Last year, the result would have been 119....the year before, target number of 118.

    Just insert any addition/subtraction problem to result in target number. Kiddo should have some fun with this one in school!
     
    yooperdave, Dec 2, 2020
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  12. Loon

    Loon

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    Done this a hundred times and always get in chit from an old bag that shouldnt be out and about.:headbang: :coldone:

    [​IMG]
     
    Loon, Dec 2, 2020
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  13. yooperdave

    yooperdave

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    Twice today!

    I even had the gestapo at Menards tell me to step outside the yellow painted area on the floor; not inside! :picard:
     
    yooperdave, Dec 2, 2020
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  14. Loon

    Loon

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    Fun eh man? :coldone: I keep my toilet shut just cuss.
     
    Loon, Dec 2, 2020
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  15. wildwest

    wildwest Moderator

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    I dialed my grandmother in law (RIP) so excited to tell her I found her birth grandparents. She was nice but sounded off and did not follow my story about finding out what she wanted to know for almost 90 years... I mentioned her sister and brother should know about this too. The lady replied "I don't have a brother". We figured out I had dialed 9143 instead of 9134 in my excitement of finding her biological grandfather. Bananas, same age, same city, and she was thrilled to get a call from a grandchild, too bad it was not her grandchild or grandkid in law.
    Enamelon. Sodamints. Brush belts for my favorite vacuum.
     
    wildwest, Dec 2, 2020
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  16. yooperdave

    yooperdave

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    Even if you did by mistake, you still made someone's day! :handshake:
     
    yooperdave, Dec 3, 2020
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  17. Rumpy

    Rumpy

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    It worked for me
     
    Rumpy, Dec 3, 2020
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  18. Gary_602z

    Gary_602z

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    Year off for me.

    Gary
     
    Gary_602z, Dec 3, 2020
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  19. yooperdave

    yooperdave

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    Due to a late birthday?
     
    yooperdave, Dec 3, 2020
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  20. Gary_602z

    Gary_602z

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    Yep, Will be one year older and deeper in debt next week.:)

    Gary
     
    Gary_602z, Dec 3, 2020
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