Now I'm grumpy.

This happens to me constantly and even from people I've known my whole life. "You look grumpy". I have always had a somber/stern at neutral expression. I am not grumpy, mad, sad, irritated, pained. I am very introvert, no fluff and glitter BS and practical, but that doesn't mean I'm 24/7 in a bad mood. I actually feel that people that are flamboyantly happy all the time are less trustworthy and loyal when it comes down to brass tacks. However why do people feel free to come up and say things like "you look grumpy, mad, or whatever". A# with a lead in like that you just initiated me possibly becoming that way. B# would they like it if I just came up and said you look like a smarmy car salesman with your eternal grin. C# I've tried the putting on a fake smile and all it does is put me in a bad mood because I'm being fake AF. D# I shouldn't have to explain to you that this is what I look like when I am relaxed and actually enjoy being quiet and contemplative. Finally yes this was brought on because the corporate big dogs came for a tour and we/I was asked to be approachable.

 

Wow. You sound grumpy.

 

People naturally profile. Facial expressions are important. Grandparents use to say He/she had or has a dour expression.

 

I get it that I may not look the most chipper. I just wonder why people feel the need to state it to me when they wouldn't go up and tell someone you look fat you should lose weight, or you sure are ugly you should try different make up. Guess that is why I like working firewood, I am alone and don't have to impress anyone and people are less apt to comment to a guy holding a chainsaw or splitting maul.

 

Women have a term for this. “Resting b!tch face” We must be cut from the same cloth. I used to get that all the time from my current boss until he realized it’s just how I carry myself most days. Super focused on work or preoccupied within the world inside my own head. That’s how it goes. On the odd days where I’m outwardly cheerful, it usually means I’m over caffeinated But I hear you. Being asked what’s wrong all the time is a sure way to drive me up the wall.

 

I’ve been told the same thing many times as well when most times I am in a good/happy mood.

 

I get it...I have been accused of "looking grumpy" before. Ironically, being accused of looking grumpy makes me grumpy!

 

What if you like not being approached?

 

In my younger days I remember going to work one day in a particularly stellar mood. New GF, had life by the you-know-what and was on cloud 9 somewhere after a fun evening the night before. I jokingly asked a coworker who had been unusually quiet that morning if he needed a hug. He almost broke into tears and told me a family member just passed away. Talk about feeling like the scum of the earth. I keep my mouth shut now (or at least half the time, which saves me half the trouble)

 

Bud, I have this exact problem all the time, family, friends and coworkers anybody.
I'll sit, relaxed having a nice time on, say, vacation and people will tell me the same thing...WHAT THE HELL?! That's not rude but me being quiet and happy is rude?!

Sent from my LE2127 using Tapatalk

 

I don't seem to have the facial expression issue, but I get asked all the time......"do you ever think before you speak?" or "does your filter work?" or "you must not realize how some of the things sound coming out of your mouth."

 

I have a resting b*tch face. If I smile without showing my teeth, people can't tell I'm smiling. Even my own sister has asked me what is wrong when I've been perfectly fine. When I'm concentrating or thoughtful, I look mad. One of the reasons I love working from home, besides I don't have to actually be around people, is that I don't get comments like:

• Smile
• You should smile more
• It can't be that bad (it can be, do not ever say this to anyone - it COULD be that bad)
  
• If you smile you fell better
  
• Frowning takes more muscles than smiling (I'm exercising my face, so shut it)
• You don't have anything to be unhappy about (I'm not unhappy, I'm perfectly content until you opened your mouth)
• It's not like someone died (Another thing not to ever say to anyone)

Then there are the corollaries, that if you look at it, just is telling you to look happy so others aren't uncomfortable

• Everything happens for a reason
• Things will be much better, you'll see
• My so-and-so (BIL, SIL, brother, sister, cousin, neighbor) had that happen and now they are gazillionaires with the bestest spouse, ideal kids and are traveling the world.
• Look at it this way, you aren't dead yet
  
• What doesn't kill you makes you stronger

Bah, just thinking of all the things I've heard over my lifetime just makes me grumpier than waking up at 12:15 am, for the second morning in a row has accomplished.

 

Come on, smile...The Government is gonna pay off your student loans!

 

Wear a shirt like this.


I received one as a gift…

 

I resemble your post.

 

People look at me weird when I say I am not a people person. Yet I have greatly enjoyed my Ag. Shop teaching career of over 30+ years. I greatly enjoy teaching students that want to learn. It is amazing to see when a student understands/gets it. Yet with driving a morning and afternoon bus route and 6 hours in the shop with over 120 students, I am tired at the end of the day. Generally I want to go home, do chores, hug the dog and pet the wife eeer swap the last two! But yeah, people, I am done. First day of school is always fun, everyone talking of their vacations and such and eventually the question comes to me, I say, "stayed home and worked on our farm". Inevitably they respond with , "sorry". I tell them not to be sorry because for my wife and I, each day we spend on our farm and don't have to leave it, it is a day of heaven on earth for us. My MIL and FIL were wonderful examples of what not to be. Gave me life lessons I try to show daily to my son in laws (nope, no butt kissing but true feelings/reactions to their actions). I am a hermit and enjoyed as a kid being on my own and working on mom and dad's farm. Enjoy who you are, heck with the others.

 

Bah, I paid as I went. I didn't start until I was in my 30's, and it took 7 years since I was also working full time, but I had $0 school debt when I got my BS degree.

 

I feel your pain as I've been told the same thing as long as I can remember. Finally even put it on a M/C tag years ago (wanted Grumpy however NH only allows 5 letters on motorcycle tags). Even ended up with the "grumpy" moniker in radio callsigns sometimes while in the Corps. After a while, you realize it doesn't really matter what other people think.